Ways to Pop the Question to Your Bridesmaids

February 2, 2010

in Bride & Bridesmaids

You’ve found the person you’re going to spend the rest of your life with. Now let’s find those ‘maids!

Whether you have one or twenty, bridesmaids are your go-to gals for all things wedding – while your planning and on the big day. Once you’ve singled out the most important ladies in your life, you have to pop the question(s) yourself. But how shall you do it? We’ve come up with a few ideas that should fit many styles and budgets.

Have more fabulous ideas? Share them in the comments!

Simply ask them in person. Whether it’s as a group or individually, you don’t need to do anything over the top! Just ask! Take them out to dinner or invite them over for a girl’s night in, and pop the question whenever the moment it right. One word of advice – ask your Maid of Honor(s) in advance and separately. She is the “honored” one and this will make it a bit more special.

Send them on a scavenger hunt. If you want to go all out or have a lot of time on your hands, send them (together or separate) on a scavenger hunt. If you’re going to create a custom hunt for each girl, start by sending each to a special place where you share some funny memories or good times. Repeat this idea for the next location or start dropping some hints by sending them to a bridal gown shop or florist, or have them stop by a cake shop or even the place you plan to tie the knot. Wherever the final destination, be ready to greet each one at the end of the hunt with the big question!

We realize you might not live in the same town or city as your future bridesmaids, so read on for some ideas that lend themselves to OOT BMs, too!

Use humor. You get to experience both the good and the bad when it comes to being a bridesmaid – we’ve all heard the stories. Ugly dresses, nail polish color restrictions, uncomfortable shoes and having to deal with Bridezilla (well, it’s a possibility at least). And while many bridesmaids have come to the end of a wedding day swearing to never be a bridesmaid again, others have looked back and just laughed…and created things like UglyDress.com. If you and your girls like a good laugh, try taking a humorous approach to popping the question. Here are two ideas we like that embrace the uglies –

DIY cards that ask “Will you be my bridesmaid?” on the front and feature hideous dresses on the inside along with the saying “I promise. I’ll never make you wear an ugly dress.”

If you’ve got the budget (or a great stock of old prom dresses), pack up some of the most hideous dresses you can get your hands on, mail them to your maids, along with notes that read “If you’ll be my bridesmaid, I’ll never make you wear a dress like this!”

A less frightening but still humorous approach? List all the reasons your maids shouldn’t fear accepting the challenge of being one of your bridesmaids. Or, offer up all the things you’ll vow to do (or not do) as a bride. Some examples –

If you’ll be my bridesmaid, I promise to…

…never make you wear taffeta and tulle… AND lace on the same dress.

…not care if you change your hair color right before my wedding (unless, maybe, you go with a bright blue or purple…)

…not ask you to loose 10 pounds before you walk down the aisle in front of me.

…not ask you to gain 10 pounds before you walk down the aisle in front of me.

…be understanding of the fact that puce green, though it may match my tablescape perfectly, doesn’t necessarily coordinate with your skin tone.

Be sentimental. Do you guys watch sappy movies together and cry your eyeballs out? Or maybe you’re just a sentimental bunch. Put together a small scrapbook of some of the good times you’ve shared as friends and on the last page, include a short note about what her friendship means to you along with the question of the hour – Will you be my bridesmaid?

Indulge the sweet tooth. If you stop by WeddingFanatic often, you know I love anything with a nice dusting of sugar and sweetness. If you have any bridesmaids like me, ask them very sweetly – with candies, cakes, or cookies! There are a lot of good options out there, check out a few of my favorites – cookies from the too-cute Flour Pot Cookies and cakes from the always fabulous Pink Cake Box.

Spoil them. Who doesn’t like to be spoiled!? Being pampered isn’t bad either. Why not do both by gifting your gals with a monogrammed tote full of spa goodies and wedding day essentials – a robe, comfy slippers, a few candles, delicious smelling lotions, and a small zippered bag with things like stain removing pens, safety pins, mints, mini sewing kits, and whatever else you think your girls will need on W-Day!

Give them some tips. Think your ladies will be clueless about their responsibilities? Or maybe they just happen to be bookworms? How about a nice How-To guide book just for bridesmaids! There are tons of options, check out these two – The Bridesmaid Guide: Etiquette, Parties and Being Fabulous by Kate Chynoweth and The Bridesmaid Handbook by Sharon Naylor

Razzle Dazzle ‘em. If your ladies are drawn to sparkly things, consider presenting a piece of jewelry along with your question. It could be a piece that you’d like for them to wear down the aisle on your big day. Just beware – if for whatever reason one of your girls turns you down, you’re stuck with giving her the item anyway or awkwardly taking it back.

Get personal. You don’t have to do the same thing for each girl. Try picking out a little something that you know each will like and present the gifts to your ladies before, during, or after you pop the question!

What did you do (or do you plan to do) when asking your girls to be Bridesmaids? We want to hear your fabulous ideas!

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