Hey ladies (and gents), I’m so excited to tell you about a fab new program for those planning a wedding – My Wedding Workbook. It’s an online planning tool that helps you track your guest, budget and spending, vendors, and the events surrounding the big day. As you can see on the site, it might just be the next-generation online wedding planner! Even better, it’s free.

While I believe you can’t really replace a living, breathing wedding planner or coordinator (I mean really, a computer program or internet application won’t be there on your wedding day to direct vendors if need be, or tackle minor issues that pop up), this would be a stellar program to use throughout your planning process.

And, for all of you wedding planning pros out there, there is My Wedding Workbook Pro. With just as many helpful tools, this program is easy to use and incredibly helpful with tracking clients and client leads, vendors for every event, and much more.

My Wedding Workbook was created by husband and wife team, Steve and Tammy. While planning a wedding of their own, they realized there could be an even better online planning tool so, they created one!

These days, who pays for what in the wedding get-up can be however you want it to be! Often, the bride and groom pay for the whole thing themselves. But! If you are the traditional type and like to stick to the books, here is a breakdown of who traditionally pays for what in the grand scheme of things.

The Bride and Her Family

Bridal Consultant Fees

Invitations and the rest of the paper ensemble

Floral decorations for the ceremony and reception, bridesmaids and bride’s bouquet

Wedding day photography

Music for ceremony and reception

Transportation for wedding party to and from ceremony

All reception expenses

Bride’s gifts to her attendants

Bride’s gift to the groom

Groom’s wedding ring

Sexton’s service fees

Cost of soloists

Parking attendants if needed

Transportation and lodging for officiant if invited by the bride’s family

Accommodations for the bride’s attendants

Bridesmaid’s luncheon

The Groom and His Family

Bride’s engagement and wedding rings

Groom’s gift to the bride

Gifts for the groom’s attendants

Ties and gloves for the groom’s attendants, if not part of their clothing rental package

The bride’s bouquet (if tradition in that area)

The bride’s going-away corsage

Boutonnieres for groom’s attendants

Corsages for immediate members of both families

The officiant’s fees or donation

Transportation and lodging for officiant if invited by groom’s family

The marriage license

Transportation for the groom and best man to the ceremony

Expenses of the honeymoon

All costs of the rehearsal dinner

Accommodations for the groom’s attendants

Bachelor dinner/party, if he has one

Transportation and lodging expenses for the groom’s family

Bridesmaids/Honor Attendant’s

Purchase of apparel and all accessories

Transportation to and from city of wedding

A contribution to a gift from the bridesmaids to the bride

An individual gift to the couple

A shower or luncheon for the bride (optional)

Ushers/Best Man

Rental of wedding attire

Transportation to and from the city of the wedding

A contribution to a gift from the groom’s attendants to the groom

An individual gift to the couple

A bachelor dinner/party, if given by the groom’s attendants

Out of Town Guests

Transportation to and from city of wedding

Lodging

Wedding gift

I want to focus on a topic that is not discussed often, if at all – preparing your Bridal Suite. If you can imagine a wedding day filled with non-stop action and passion, tears, and excitement, you can then imagine the "crash" that many couples feel once they leave the reception to head back to their Bridal Suite for their first night together as a new couple. This post is dedicated to making your overnight stay "post-wedding" a comforting success. If you are unable to prep by completing the tasks described below, perhaps you can ask a trusted friend or family member not in the wedding party to accommodate.

During your planning phase, consider the following questions and suggestions and how they will relate to your post-wedding overnight accommodations experience:

What will you eat? You may have just spent eight to ten hours looking and acting perfect, and perhaps you did not feel like or did not get a chance to eat at your own reception. You’ll likely feel like consuming something light, something healthy, something without sugar or caffeine. Consider packing a meal to have waiting in the room, or better yet pre-order room service with your ideal meal. Remember, indulge yourselves…you don’t have to eat the same thing if you don’t want to! If all else fails (or you forget to plan this part) you can always just order in pizza or Chinese and be less formal. Just make sure that you are able to find napkins and plates.

What will you drink? First, something hydrating, then perhaps something soothing. Whether a cup of tea or a night cap, have your favorite beverages and the proper equipment (ice, cups/glasses, tea, etc.) waiting for you in your room. Keep in mind that if you order alcohol from the hotel bar you can expect a price mark-up of literally at least 100% – A $35 magnum of Grey Goose will be marked-up as high as $100 – so plan accordingly.)

What will you listen to or watch? (Hint: not TV)…but maybe a movie you both like playing in the background? (Will you need a DVD player?) What if you want to listen to a favorite CD, or what if you have packed along your mp3 player and some little speakers (will you need your charger or batteries?)?

What will you want to smell? Soothing scents can enhance nearly everyone’s experience, no matter the situation. Consider bringing along some scented candles, incense, or room fragrance. Soothing scents such as lavender or vanilla will help your post-wedding transition.

What will help you to relax? Perhaps your idea of relaxation is popping open a beer, or perhaps you are anticipating sore feet and muscles. To relieve a day’s worth of stress consider scheduling an in-room double massage for you and your sweetie. Believe me, there are companies that offer this in-room service – be sure to ask your concierge for a referral. (Don’t feel bad if you both find yourselves totally unwound and napping during the massage!) If a professional massage is out of the question, give each other a little rub-down (at least your feet!).

What type of lighting is present? Candlelight is most flattering, white (holiday) lights are magical. Whatever your lighting preference consider using dramatic lighting. There is a chance that the room you are staying in has adjustable lighting (which means no extra work for you), so be sure to ask. Important: if you are going to bring candles make sure that you bring candle plates or holders to catch the melted dripping wax…you don’t want to have to pay for room damage. Also, make sure that they have a fire extinguisher in the room (or at least nearby) for unforeseeable emergencies.

What will you want to wear? If you have packed something sexy to ‘play’ in, don’t forget to pack something new and comfortable to sleep in. Sleeping in your ‘everynight’ pajamas is not exciting, so consider purchasing a new pajama set…it will make your first married nights sleep a huge and special success.

Take a nap. Seriously. Whoever "invented" sex immediately following post-wedding may have been unwilling to discuss the sheer exhaustion which tries to infiltrate most newly married couples bedrooms. Before you both completely unwind for the evening, consider setting an alarm or scheduling a wake-up call with the front desk, and then settle down for a nice mid-sized nap. Once you wake-up you can shower or bathe and then begin the next phase of your night together.

The formal wake-up call . Perhaps you have brunch with your family scheduled for the next morning, or perhaps you are both going to get a massage. Be sure to call the front desk for a wake-up call, or be sure to pack and bring your own alarm to set, or have one of your friends call your hotel room. You won’t want to oversleep if you have plans for the next morning.

Do Not Disturb (DND ). If you end up getting into bed late (and waking-up late) you won’t want to be disturbed by the hotel staff trying to clean so be sure to place the DND sign on the door and enjoy. Another form of DND will be to hold your phone calls (call the front desk to request this), or simply unplug your hotel room phone. Don’t forget to turn-off your cell phones. You’ve earned a night together without any outside interruptions.

Enjoy your first night together!

Best,

Alisha Forrester Scott

La Ruche. event design studio.

You can reach AFS by e-mailing: studio@enterlaruche.com

Last Saturday, December 20, my little sister entered into matrimony . In Arizona where we reside, cold weather may be defined as "below 70 degrees Fahrenheit". So, you can imagine the goose pimples on the guests when weather for the outdoor ceremony and reception dipped below 50 degrees Fahrenheit.

Although most of the guests toughed-out the cold weather and stayed for the entire event, with recent memories of freezing fingers and toes, I propose the following ways to help avoid freezing guests and dwindling guest numbers:

1. Mention the weather considerations in your invitation – You may wish to place a mention the cold weather alongside the registry, wedding website, or venue map. For my sisters wedding we used a single (small) card (about the same size as the Response Card [RSVP Card] for this purpose, broken down as such:

Front side – Registry, event timeline, and weather consideration mention

Back side – Venue address, map, and driving directions

2. Having an indoor ceremony and/or reception? Set-up a coat check area . Guests will appreciate not having to lug around their winter coats, or worse yet having to hang them over the back of their chairs.

3. Having the event(s) indoors away from the cold weather? Err on the side of placing the thermostat temperature "a little cool". Consider that your guests may not be able to peel off too many layers past their winter coats should the indoor temperature climb. (Nearly everyone gets warm when they dance.)

4. Having the event(s) outdoors in the cold weather? Err on the side of heat which means considering the use of heaters, fireplaces, hand-warming packets , or decorative fire pits (covered or screened) where guests can warm their parts and then leave to enjoy more wedding action.

5. Incremental weather means having brooms on-hand to sweep away water, shovels or a snowplow on stand-by to make a path in snow, and umbrellas for the ushers use to assist guests as they arrive and depart.

6. Transportation considerations – if your ceremony and reception are in different locations and it is sure to be snowing, consider renting buses, limo buses, or cars to transport guests (to avoid parking accidents, sliding, or hydro-planing).

If you have any questions about this post, or need advice, feel free to contact studio@enterlaruche.com.

Stay warm and Happy Holidays!

Best,

Alisha Forrester Scott

La Ruche. event design studio.

Okay, so, this comment wasn’t really spoken in reference to wedding planning, but it’s definitely something we can all apply! Let’s break it down.

“For attractive lips, speak words of kindness. For lovely eyes, seek out the good in people. For a slim figure, share your food with the hungry. For beautiful hair, let a child run their fingers through it once a day. For poise, walk with the knowledge that you never walk alone. People, even more than things, have to be restored, renewed, revived, reclaimed, and remembered’ never throw out anyone. Remember, if you ever need a helping hand, you will find one at the end of each of your arms. As you grow older, you will discover that you have two hands; one for helping yourself, and the other for helping others.” Audrey Hepburn

Take Great Pictures

For attractive lips, speak words of kindness. Sometimes it’s hard to speak words of kindness, especially if someone has done something to upset you. And trust us, during the wedding planning process, someone or something will upset you. But don’t let it get to you (we know, harder than it sounds)!! Deal with issues as they come up. And on your wedding day, when someone complements your centerpieces, instead of venting for a brief five minutes about how the florist (after months of meetings) used the wrong shade of pink for the roses, simply say thank you for the compliment! If you must, you can even throw in “They are just a bit different than what we were expecting, but I sure do think they are beautiful!”.

For lovely eyes, seek out the good in people. This can be particularly difficult when you’re planning your wedding, especially if you’ve heard a lot about bad vendors. It’s one thing to play it safe when interviewing and hiring your vendors, but it’s not quite fair to assume that they are all out for just getting your money! I’d say, for the majority of vendors, that’s definitely not true. In addition, try to give people the benefit of the doubt is something little does go wrong. Looking for the good in your vendors (not to mention your family, wedding party, and guests) will help making anything that doesn’t do exactly according to plan seem less “catastrophic”.

For a slim figure, share your food with the hungry. While some couples literally do share their delicious wedding left-overs with “the hungry”, you can do something a little more figurative. For example, if you’re wanting to give philanthropic favors, donate to your local food shelter. Or, take a wedding planning brake with your fiance (or even your wedding party) and help out with a food drive. Helping others simply feels fabulous!

For beautiful hair, let a child run their fingers through it once a day. Well, if you don’t have a child handy, grab a flower girl or ring bearer. And while no, you don’t actually have to have them run their fingers through your hair, many couples do love having these youngsters around. They can add a ton of cuteness to the day, not to mention, a bit of comic relief. Unless they are little hellions, we tend to notice that they generally lighten the mood!

For poise, walk with the knowledge that you never walk alone. So true. And very good to keep in mind during your planning. You have your family, friends, vendors, wedding party, and of course, your wedding planner. And if you’re just having one of those days where it feels like no one understands or care, you always have Fido who will always, always listen to you.

People, even more than things, have to be restored, renewed, revived, reclaimed, and remembered, never throw out anyone. I’d just call this one a good life lesson. We know that your wedding is just that – yours. But keep in mind people have lives that don’t really revolve around your wedding. So if someone you adore can’t make it on the big day, just realize that they may have something else going on in their lives that is more important.

Remember, if you ever need a helping hand, you will find one at the end of each of your arms. Yes indeed. Don’t be afraid to try and do things yourself, for your wedding or any other area of your life! Doing something “all by yourself” can be really rewarding, whether it’s negotiating a contract with a vendor, designing your gown, or assembling all 300 wedding favors!

As you grow older, you will discover that you have two hands; one for helping yourself, and the other for helping others. Never underestimate the power of people. Never be afraid to help yourself and always be looking for ways to help others. With weddings, sometimes you just have to get the job done yourself! But other times, you’ll need to help someone else out a little. Perhaps your mom needs help with the tasks you gifted her with, or maybe your MOH is going through a rough patch in her life. If you have your own life under control, never be afraid to offer someone else a little assistance!

Ever heard that when shopping around for wedding vendors, as soon as they know it’s really a wedding service your shopping for, the prices magically rise? In some cases it’s true. Obviously, even if you can dance your way around the subject for a while, your vendors will eventually “find out” that they are selling their services or products to a bride. But how can the tips below help? If they quote you a price for a “non-wedding” service or product, they can’t change their prices once you tell them it’s actually for a wedding. And if they do – well, maybe you should find different vendors!

To be fair – there are a TON of great, honest, and talented vendors out there that will quote you the same price for wedding and non-wedding events alike. They are definitely the ones you want to work with! But, we must also remember that sometimes a wedding-related service DOES cost more. For example, you can’t tell a photographer that you want to hire her for a photo shoot, book her for a few hours, THEN tell her “Oh, by the way, we’d like you to be around all day because it’s actually our wedding you’ll be photographing.” It just doesn’t work that way!

Check out what we have below for some helpful hints on working with specific vendors.

Instead of saying you need reception centerpieces, altar arrangements, and personal flowers for your entire wedding party, ask something like “I’m having a party and need some arrangements for the tables. I like lilies, roses, and daisies and I’m looking to spend no more than $2000. What are my options for that price range?”

They may ask what kind of party or how many pieces you need and catch on pretty quickly (they are professionals, after all, and have been doing this for a long time). And remember that if you want them delivered or they require a special setup process, their price may rise in the end anyway.

Not all cakes are labeled “wedding cakes”, thank goodness. When shopping around for cake, try asking something like “I need a cake for a dinner party. I’m looking for something a little different, though, maybe something with square tiers in a pale pink color.” If you need a cake for oh say, 400 people, the baker will wonder. Consider your options: you could get a smaller cake from ABC Bakery that will act as your main cake, and sheet cakes from XYZ Bakery in order to feed the rest of your guests.

While it can be particularly tricky to find a “wedding dress” without asking for a “wedding dress”, it has been done! If you’d happily wear a dress with a simpler pattern or one that doesn’t really look like a “wedding dress” at all, try looking in places that aren’t strictly bridal salons. Look for white dresses anywhere dresses are sold. Or, if you find a dress you love, ask if it can be ordered in white. Depending on who makes it and where your buying it from, special ordering in different colors than you see on the rack is sometimes an option.

For bridesmaids dresses, the same thing goes. Just because you’re not shopping in a bridal salon doesn’t mean you won’t find dresses that flatter your bridesmaids and coordinate perfectly with your color scheme. Keep in mind that dresses made specifically for “special occasions” (and to go on six girls for the same event) are sometimes more cheaply made then those that are usually bought one at a time. Check out this great article from Bridezilla about cheap bridesmaids dresses and other wedding scams!

For a small reception (150 or less), telling your caterer that you’re having a large dinner party would suffice. Because in essence, that is what you’re having. Depending on whether you’re wanting plated meals or a buffet, the price will be different.

When calling around to get information on venues, merely state that you’re looking for a place to hold X number of people for an event you’re having. Ask for weekend AND weekday rates (many times they are different). It is possible to book a place without them knowing that it’s a wedding, but they will find out eventually (if not before, I think walking into the place in a wedding dress and a groom on your arm might just be a dead giveaway ).

For these vendors, a wedding truly means more work, so don’t be surprised when their wedding packages are more pricey. But in all fairness, while you may be paying more, but you’re definitely getting more, too. You can just schedule a shoot with normal sitting fees, etc. with a photographer for your engagement pictures. But, it is good to let them know what these pictures will be for so they can advise you on what to wear and give you more helpful tips.

From Real Simple

*Side note: I like the looks of the bouquet…but I can’t stand the smell of Baby’s Breath. Yick!

In the end, don’t lie. It’s just not nice! But at the same time, neither is charging more for something just because it’s for a wedding. Use those smarts and go get yourself some honest deals!

To have kids at your wedding and reception or not to have kids at your wedding reception? It can be a hard question to answer if you have a lot of kids in the family, have lots of friends that have kids…or just don’t like kids. There are a lot of reasons you may or may not want them present. Some questions to ask yourself:

-Will a lot of the guests we really want to attend, not attend if they can’t bring their children?

-Can we live with the possible distraction of having children present?

-Is there a place at the ceremony site for parents to take loud or unruly children/crying babies?

-Will there be so many children present that special measures should be taken (a special menu, etc) and can we afford the added expense?

-Will having children present add to or take away from the over all wedding day experience?

If you like the idea of having little ones there on your big day, here are some ideas for keeping them happy!

-Have a special table for them in the reception area. Cover the table with butcher paper and coloring utensils to keep them busy.

-Have a table of games and fun activities set up near the back of the reception area or in a different room for some kid-friendly fun while parents are havin’ a good time.

-Consider hiring a sitter (or more than one if you have a lot of tiny things running around) for the evening and have him or her (or them) do all the kid-watching. If your reception is in a hotel or another place with additional available rooms, consider renting a room just for kids.

-Have kid-friendly food. Chicken strips, little hamburgers, French fries, apple slices, Mac n’ Cheese. The list is quite long.

Overall, children can add a youthful, precious touch to your day, if you like having them around. If nothing else, they make for some super cute photo opportunities.

Opening Note: Don’t forget to check out the bottom of the post for a GIVEAWAY!

If you’re an organized bride, you know how important true organization is! It’s one thing to have your vendors “organized” (aka just booked) and something completely different to have every wedding detail in its proper place. And even better, have them in such a way that in case of an emergency, someone else can step up and know where to find everything. This means current contact lists, well organized information (in binders, folders, etc.), and easily accessible wedding day items.

That’s where the DYMO Personal Lablemaker comes in. Not only does it fit perfectly and comfortably in the palm of your hand, but it has a 13 character display, a color-coded keyboard, 5 font styles, 7 print styles, 8 boarder styles, 195 symbols, and the capability to print on two lines. Phew! In addition, what you see on the screen is exactly what the label maker prints out!

I’m not one for reading too deep into directions. So of course as soon as I got mine, I cut open the package and got to labeling. I figured I would have to do some sort of setup or programming process before I could begin using the machine, but all I had to do was press “On”! So naturally, it was love at first button.

Check out this bad boy!

Yeah. It makes my heart beat a little faster.

DYMO has teamed up with the Clutter Queen for some helpful wedding planning/organizational tips. Here they are, from the Queen herself:

1. Make a detailed shopping list of all of the organizational supplies and tools you’ll need to plan your wedding. You’ll need things like file folders, a three-ring binder, albums and boxes for cards and photos, and a DYMO® Personal Labelmaker – these will help keep you and your fiancé organized while planning the big day.

2. Create a binder with sections labeled for calendar, dress ideas, guest list, registry, shopping lists, showers and parties, thank you cards, gift lists, bridal party schedules, and so on. Take the binder with you on appointments and meetings. Everything will be in one place for easy reference.

3. To help keep track of the landslide of wedding gifts you receive, use file folders and label them by category – gift cards and certificates, receipts, returns, etc. Also, consider labeling the outside of the box a gift comes in with who gave it to you. This will help when writing thank you notes later.

4. Designate a table in a low-traffic area of your home for crafting wedding favors, invitations, note cards, etc. Use a DYMO® Personal Labelmaker to clearly label boxes for RSVPs, cards, ribbons, table-setting cards and more.

5. Instead of letting wedding cards and photos pile up, store them in an album or photo box. Be sure to label the backs of cards and photos with names, dates, and location for quick and easy reference.

6. Make multiple copies of photos and other special memorabilia to create one-of-a-kind “brag books” for your mom, grandma, and soon to be step-mom to show-off to their friends later.

7. If there is something you need only for the wedding, consider borrowing from a friend or relative. A family heirloom – like your grandmother’s cake knife or your mother’s cake topper – will not only add sentimental value to your wedding but save you shopping time and money.

8. If you plan to provide a special CD for the DJ to use during the reception, clearly label the disc case with the song name and track number using a product like the DYMO® Personal Labelmaker. For a more personalized disc, use the DYMO® DiscPainter™ CD/DVD printer, which will print text and photos directly onto the disc. This way there aren’t any slip-ups during your special dance.

So, now that your mouth is watering and your organizational gears are turning, don’t you just want to get your hands on one? HERE IS YOUR CHANCE! We are giving one away! All you have to do is leave a comment and we’ll randomly pick a winner at the end of the week. We’ll send you an email asking for your mailing address and you’ll get the labelmaker sent right to your doorstep. So get to commenting! =)

WEDDING DAY! It’s a big day, and many times, it sneaks up on you (I know, hard to believe). Even with all that planning and organizing, it’s very possible that one or two (or more) things might slip under your radar. Here is a little list of things that often get passed by or misplaced and how to remember or keep track of them!

EATING
How it happens: I can’t tell you HOW important this is – for EVERYONE! The bride, the groom, the bridal party, parents and grandparents, and even your vendors/wedding professionals. Once the day starts and emotions and excitement are running high, it’s easy to get distracted or just push eating aside.
How to prevent it: Schedule a time to eat into your wedding day time line. And, to make sure the food gets to you or wherever it needs to go, designate a person to pick it up, transport, and deliver it. Or, if you plan to have something delivered from a restaurant, order it a week or so before so you don’t have to scurry around at the last minute trying to get everyone fed.

TEARS
How it happens: Well, by tears I mean people crying where there is a lack of facial tissues. We don’t want family members sitting in the front row to be bawling, mascara running down their cheeks, and Kleenexless!
How to prevent it: Long before the ceremony starts, put little packs of Kleenex at the ends of the front few rows (or in all of the pews if you invited a ton of criers!). And for the bridal party, make sure everyone has a tissue tied into their bouquets or in a pockes for easy access. You never know when tears might start!

CANDLES
How it happens: Candles can create a fabulously romantic ambiance. But, if matches and lighters are forgotten, they can’t create that romantic vibe! And what’s more important, if you’re using candles in your ceremony (aka unity candles) and don’t have any method of lighting them, you’d have to skip over the ritual for lack of flame! *gasp*
How to prevent it: pack lighters or matches in your wedding day emergency kit, keep some with all of your decorating items, and keep a small matchbox up at the alter (behind a strategically placed flower arrangement, perhaps). This way, even if other candles aren’t lit, when it’s time for you to light the unity candles, you can still…light your fire.

SORE FEET
How it happens: Unless you’ve worn your wedding day shoes for, well, an entire day, you might now know how your feet will react to being in them for such a long time.
How to prevent it: First, break in those beautiful shoes! Wear them around the house, do a little dancing in them, etc. Also, have a back up pair – whether they are flats or just more comfortable heels – so that you can let your feet have a break and you can keep on partying!

TIPS
How it happens: You don’t necessarily NEED to tip your vendors, but sometimes you want to. But, as the day comes to a close and vendors start leaving (or you leave), a tip can be overlooked.
How to prevent it: On envelopes, write the name of each vendor and the service they provide (for example, “Emma Smith, Cake”) before the wedding day. Then designate someone to pass them out just before the vendors leave (or throughout the day as items are dropped off and set up). Keep a few envelopes and your checkbook or cash in your bag (or have your wedding coordinator, mom, dad, MOH, etc. be in charge of this) so that if someone goes above and beyond, you can say thanks with a little extra somethin’; somethin’!